








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 195 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2131 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,541 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1424 | 40% |
| Smokes | 182 | 5% |
| HE Grenades | 736 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1199 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $541,977 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 113 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MNK | Unga Bunga | 60% | 89 |
| #2 | Nitch_zzZZ | 53% | 38 |
| #3 | BEE | 52% | 25 |
| #4 | Crazy Mike | 48% | 151 |
| #5 | Jedi | 46% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MNK | Unga Bunga | 38 | 0.0206 |
| #2 | Jedi | 19 | 0.0119 |
| #3 | Nitch_zzZZ | 14 | 0.0172 |
| #4 | CeeWu | 11 | 0.0233 |
| #5 | Bacon_Man20 | 10 | 0.0201 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crazy Mike | 303 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | Jedi | 161 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | MNK | Unga Bunga | 139 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Nitch_zzZZ | 128 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Meow | 119 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CeeWu | +4.26 | 61 | 59 |
| #2 | MNK | Unga Bunga | +3.05 | 67 | 38 |
| #3 | Crazy Mike | +2.68 | 63 | 55 |
| #4 | BEE | +1.30 | 54 | 29 |
| #5 | QRick | -0.05 | 42 | 39 |





