








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2301 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 538 matches | ||
| Esplay | 96 matches | 1,801 | |
| Competitive Mirage | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 85 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




69 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9290 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,797 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7656 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6454 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6283 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5404 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,362,233 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1275 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smurgees | 57% | 46 |
| #2 | Raffe | 56% | 84 |
| #3 | HuTTUzzz | 54% | 57 |
| #4 | 𝔭𝔢𝔯̶1̶𝔫𝔤𝔢 | 53% | 76 |
| #5 | Fabbski | 53% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HuTTUzzz | +4.09 | 82 | 63 |
| #2 | wolfen | +3.51 | 84 | 62 |
| #3 | 𝔭𝔢𝔯̶1̶𝔫𝔤𝔢 | +3.14 | 83 | 69 |
| #4 | Koppen | +2.22 | 63 | 56 |
| #5 | Raffe | +0.75 | 58 | 60 |





