








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 353 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 237 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6694 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,885 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6187 | 20% |
| Smokes | 10868 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 5841 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 7989 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $893,289 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 159 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ c0mp | 64% | 36 |
| #2 | Skeem | 53% | 498 |
| #3 | Bóbr | 52% | 42 |
| #4 | sleezy | 52% | 65 |
| #5 | Brinki | 48% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | sleezy | 52% | 65 |
| #5 | Brinki | 48% | 107 |
| #6 | マンコが大好き | 45% | 96 |
| #7 | Reni | 44% | 39 |
| #8 | Softy | 42% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skeem | 31 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Softy | 30 | 0.0172 |
| #3 | Reni | 13 | 0.0168 |
| #4 | Brinki | 8 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | ✪ c0mp | 8 | 0.0110 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brinki | 407 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #2 | Skeem | 383 | 0.04 | 10 min |
| #3 | sleezy | 170 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | マンコが大好き | 130 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Softy | 120 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brinki | +3.06 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | sleezy | +2.43 | 71 | 62 |
| #3 | Raphacchi | +0.77 | 67 | 66 |
| #4 | ✪ c0mp | +0.70 | 70 | 38 |
| #5 | Skeem | -0.67 | 55 | 47 |





