








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 428 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5298 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,488 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3603 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3042 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3934 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2909 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,497,574 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 195 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j1MESY | 51% | 295 |
| #2 | Joontti | 50% | 102 |
| #3 | dnky ツ | 48% | 150 |
| #4 | Emppu | 45% | 186 |
| #5 | JesusGotDrip | 44% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dnky ツ | +2.06 | 83 | 62 |
| #2 | sneakyvicko | +0.36 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | j1MESY | +0.34 | 50 | 54 |
| #4 | Emppu | +0.02 | 68 | 42 |
| #5 | Joontti | -0.55 | 41 | 58 |





