








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 164 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 542 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3170 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,160 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10740 | 48% |
| Smokes | 4891 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2700 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 3829 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $425,682 of utility $29 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 191 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✯WhitePlague✯ | 59% | 39 |
| #2 | [ABWFF]thezfunk | 44% | 180 |
| #3 | t3h_r00st3r | 43% | 126 |
| #4 | Outlaw | 41% | 63 |
| #5 | Maniac.0330 | 38% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 007Aston | 297 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #2 | [ABWFF]thezfunk | 231 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | Maniac.0330 | 75 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Outlaw | 61 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | t3h_r00st3r | 52 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [ABWFF]thezfunk | +1.81 | 52 | 43 |
| #2 | 007Aston | +1.00 | 20 | 67 |
| #3 | thezfunk | +0.88 | 60 | 47 |
| #4 | Maniac.0330 | +0.37 | 46 | 52 |
| #5 | t3h_r00st3r | -0.69 | 61 | 40 |





