








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 516 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 228 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4862 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,027 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7728 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6064 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 6143 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6092 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,307,952 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valtzu | 53% | 306 |
| #2 | Kone | 51% | 138 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valtzu | 53% | 306 |
| #2 | Kone | 51% | 138 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kone | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Valtzu | 4 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valtzu | 887 | 0.14 | 27 min |
| #2 | Kone | 469 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valtzu | +0.54 | 67 | 67 |
| #2 | warrot | +0.09 | 70 | 74 |
| #3 | Kone | -0.10 | 72 | 68 |





