








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 70 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2363 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,861 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3362 | 38% |
| Smokes | 2017 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1889 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1593 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $359,221 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 339 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | sasquatcH | 61% | 54 |
| #7 | dopeysparks | 59% | 87 |
| #8 | BARRAGE | 59% | 41 |
| #9 | The Ripper | 57% | 97 |
| #10 | Lopez✌ | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Ripper | 371 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #2 | aimex | 315 | 0.28 | 9 min |
| #3 | BARRAGE | 210 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #4 | dopeysparks | 170 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | sasquatcH | 165 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aimex | +3.06 | 71 | 72 |
| #2 | 4sh0t | +2.64 | 77 | 65 |
| #3 | dopeysparks | +2.09 | 86 | 66 |
| #4 | cjb | +1.92 | 82 | 72 |
| #5 | The Ripper | +0.97 | 77 | 79 |





