








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 434 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 170 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3431 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,732 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5422 | 43% |
| Smokes | 3072 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2384 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1854 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $930,550 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 493 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kordalinge | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | aTk | 9 | 0.0139 |
| #3 | Tao | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | TorixX.production | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | marmulax | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kordalinge | 399 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #2 | Tao | 396 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #3 | TorixX.production | 329 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #4 | Martine | 212 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #5 | marmulax | 175 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Ultimate Caillou | +2.69 | 79 | 60 |
| #2 | Tao | +2.47 | 86 | 68 |
| #3 | TorixX.production | +1.87 | 77 | 76 |
| #4 | oliv | +1.81 | 73 | 61 |
| #5 | Ankou | +1.80 | 72 | 67 |





