








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 373 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
936 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,017 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 408 | 20% |
| Smokes | 489 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 565 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 555 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $274,341 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 74 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alitty | 86% | 7 |
| #2 | xetyyrK | 86% | 7 |
| #3 | Donye Wump | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | Frank | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | ♿♿_____________________ | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ap | 165 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | pohzr | 147 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #3 | AlittyMONSTER | 99 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #4 | Darwizzy | 97 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | Alitty | 64 | 0.45 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xetyyrK | +7.56 | 82 | 73 |
| #2 | Kryytex | +4.00 | 91 | 77 |
| #3 | Tyron | +2.01 | 79 | 54 |
| #4 | Donye Wump | +1.62 | 84 | 46 |
| #5 | Alitty | +1.07 | 59 | 76 |





