








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
640 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,116 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 451 | 21% |
| Smokes | 586 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 514 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 565 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $135,719 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 366 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bodito | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | Memeske | 100% | 7 |
| #3 | fleav | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | James8K | 67% | 6 |
| #5 | R1Ptor 🦖 | 64% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | R1Ptor 🦖 | 64% | 14 |
| #6 | strong3r- | 64% | 11 |
| #7 | playnn | 60% | 10 |
| #8 | Frip | 50% | 4 |
| #9 | msN | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | playnn | 2 | 0.0092 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R1Ptor 🦖 | 39 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #2 | fleav | 25 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #3 | playnn | 23 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | Memeske | 21 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #5 | bodito | 15 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | playnn | +5.39 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | Memeske | +4.43 | 89 | 50 |
| #3 | bodito | +3.56 | 81 | 69 |
| #4 | R1Ptor 🦖 | +2.21 | 79 | 68 |
| #5 | fleav | +2.00 | 94 | 52 |





