








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Faceit | 86 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




86 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3434 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,360 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3258 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2805 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2008 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2289 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $869,051 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1341 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ici ca baise | 65% | 34 |
| #2 | Amleiza | 55% | 107 |
| #3 | s | 53% | 87 |
| #4 | BrigadeDeStups | 48% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ici ca baise | 65% | 34 |
| #2 | Amleiza | 55% | 107 |
| #3 | s | 53% | 87 |
| #4 | BrigadeDeStups | 48% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s | 53 | 0.0302 |
| #2 | Amleiza | 21 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | BrigadeDeStups | 4 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s | 445 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #2 | Amleiza | 228 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | BrigadeDeStups | 210 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | ici ca baise | 159 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s | +2.30 | 91 | 38 |
| #2 | ici ca baise | +1.04 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | lay. | +0.99 | 77 | 53 |
| #4 | Amleiza | +0.47 | 80 | 57 |
| #5 | BrigadeDeStups | -0.93 | 75 | 60 |





