








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 151 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1854 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,317 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1978 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1743 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1098 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1498 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $433,408 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 452 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☜✪MoRo✪☞ | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Leon Torn | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | marteN | 70% | 20 |
| #4 | EVADE | 70% | 20 |
| #5 | CyreX | 68% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CEO:P | 250 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #2 | sVn | 102 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | EVADE | 98 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #4 | shift11 | 84 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #5 | marteN | 66 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Horstor ︻芫==↼ | +2.98 | 87 | 47 |
| #2 | Tottii | +2.92 | 83 | 81 |
| #3 | EVADE | +2.76 | 82 | 74 |
| #4 | CyreX | +2.30 | 86 | 59 |
| #5 | ☜✪MoRo✪☞ | +1.63 | 86 | 75 |





