








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1485 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,335 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 310 | 13% |
| Smokes | 747 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 836 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 442 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $520,109 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Thraxity | 44% | 125 |
| #3 | tugboatwilly | 44% | 96 |
| #4 | Sui | 43% | 119 |
| #5 | tjhiphop | 43% | 127 |
| #6 | Topher | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sui | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | tjhiphop | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Thraxity | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sui | 271 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | tjhiphop | 223 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #3 | Thraxity | 166 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Topher | 118 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #5 | tugboatwilly | 103 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thraxity | +2.09 | 58 | 44 |
| #2 | Visions | +0.41 | 71 | 29 |
| #3 | Sui | -0.42 | 39 | 70 |
| #4 | tjhiphop | -0.80 | 48 | 62 |
| #5 | Topher | -1.50 | 61 | 53 |





