








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 212 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1294 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,083 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1373 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1248 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 812 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1650 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $518,191 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mxxn | 70% | 27 |
| #2 | Ryan the energetic | 66% | 32 |
| #3 | edzbrian | 64% | 11 |
| #4 | asphyx | 64% | 22 |
| #5 | 打手枪高手 | 63% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wokeh | 6 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | asphyx | 6 | 0.0141 |
| #3 | mahou shoujo | 4 | 0.0061 |
| #4 | mxxn | 3 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | venusa | 2 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wokeh | 132 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | asphyx | 132 | 0.31 | 2 min |
| #3 | ReMuuu | 97 | 0.35 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ryan the energetic | 96 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | mahou shoujo | 82 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wungus | +3.65 | 83 | 50 |
| #2 | ken karson | +2.86 | 64 | 55 |
| #3 | asphyx | +2.73 | 74 | 55 |
| #4 | mahou shoujo | +2.47 | 80 | 51 |
| #5 | mxxn | +2.27 | 74 | 48 |





