








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1042 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,812 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2093 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1454 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 961 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1304 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $210,787 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ando | 68% | 59 |
| #2 | SidneyS | 57% | 76 |
| #3 | Robin | 55% | 113 |
| #4 | TelNairS | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | Piss | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ando | 68% | 59 |
| #2 | SidneyS | 57% | 76 |
| #3 | Robin | 55% | 113 |
| #4 | TelNairS | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | Piss | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robin | 11 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Ando | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | SidneyS | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Piss | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robin | 326 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | SidneyS | 203 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | Ando | 87 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | TelNairS | 54 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Piss | 33 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robin | +2.32 | 77 | 61 |
| #2 | SidneyS | +1.25 | 82 | 67 |
| #3 | Just11n | +0.55 | 62 | 75 |
| #4 | Ando | -1.16 | 76 | 48 |
| #5 | TelNairS | -2.21 | 68 | 51 |





