








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 191 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2338 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,035 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3118 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2700 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3189 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3028 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $569,925 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 197 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | macro | 51% | 102 |
| #2 | Goosemode | 50% | 46 |
| #3 | TheDumbG00se | 44% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | macro | 51% | 102 |
| #2 | Goosemode | 50% | 46 |
| #3 | TheDumbG00se | 44% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | macro | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | TheDumbG00se | 6 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Goosemode | 4 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | macro | 316 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #2 | Goosemode | 186 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | TheDumbG00se | 115 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | macro | +2.45 | 88 | 58 |
| #2 | TheDumbG00se | +1.42 | 72 | 52 |
| #3 | Miss Aluminum | -0.57 | 51 | 66 |
| #4 | Goosemode | -0.68 | 63 | 63 |





