










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 159 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
923 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,587 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1045 | 29% |
| Smokes | 967 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 679 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 896 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $200,944 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 123 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MacchoMachico | 89% | 9 |
| #2 | hbnr | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | Suw | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Madele | 51% | 39 |
| #5 | mayuyu | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Madele | 51% | 39 |
| #5 | mayuyu | 45% | 20 |
| #6 | tan4 | 44% | 9 |
| #7 | ハイエース | 44% | 25 |
| #8 | INOP | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Madele | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | ハイエース | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Madele | 78 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | mayuyu | 66 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | ハイエース | 49 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | MacchoMachico | 35 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | Suw | 27 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hbnr | +3.02 | 67 | 55 |
| #2 | Dial | +2.25 | 56 | 71 |
| #3 | Suw | +2.08 | 79 | 48 |
| #4 | mayuyu | +1.08 | 40 | 47 |
| #5 | MacchoMachico | +0.62 | 73 | 60 |





