








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
276 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 832 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 293 | 35% |
| Smokes | 199 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 160 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 180 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $17,950 of utility $32 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juris | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | Torriss | 80% | 10 |
| #3 | surfin | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | 헤르미 | 75% | 4 |
| #5 | Syswal | 71% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | surfin | 31 | 0.41 | 1 min |
| #2 | Juris | 29 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | Torriss | 23 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | sellbeast. | 12 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | Syswal | 7 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tok | +3.40 | 77 | 56 |
| #2 | surfin | +3.33 | 52 | 56 |
| #3 | E-Thug Zoid | +2.44 | 55 | 51 |
| #4 | 헤르미 | +2.14 | 57 | 41 |
| #5 | Torriss | +1.08 | 69 | 46 |





