








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 23 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 75 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3161 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,888 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5854 | 49% |
| Smokes | 1313 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 3052 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1669 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $332,262 of utility $46 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YOMOMMA | 54% | 63 |
| #2 | poboki | 50% | 177 |
| #3 | summerl2e | 48% | 40 |
| #4 | Kiwi | 47% | 36 |
| #5 | indy | 44% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | summerl2e | 48% | 40 |
| #4 | Kiwi | 47% | 36 |
| #5 | indy | 44% | 119 |
| #6 | FalconX02 | 43% | 61 |
| #7 | Tuan | 40% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tuan | 15 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | poboki | 10 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | indy | 10 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | YOMOMMA | 9 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | FalconX02 | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YOMOMMA | 251 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #2 | indy | 178 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Kiwi | 154 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #4 | Tuan | 79 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | FalconX02 | 74 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | indy | +3.83 | 79 | 57 |
| #2 | YOMOMMA | +2.09 | 79 | 51 |
| #3 | Tuan | +0.33 | 39 | 46 |
| #4 | Kiwi | -0.24 | 37 | 74 |
| #5 | poboki | -0.52 | 67 | 15 |





