








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 220 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 1,580 | |
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2823 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,374 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1542 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1519 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 3607 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 2706 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,411,156 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 114 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SwiftzZ ❤™ | 13 | 0.0231 |
| #2 | Tiggyyyyyyyy | 9 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | Ra1JtZ | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Cr0cz | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | woopa | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ra1JtZ | 418 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #2 | woopa | 376 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | Cr0cz | 248 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | FocuseD | 243 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | Tiggyyyyyyyy | 184 | 0.16 | 4 min |





