








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 122 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 50 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2968 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,028 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4096 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3947 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2838 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3147 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $781,880 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 98 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hawkeye | 63% | 84 |
| #2 | [OG] Agent Masicker | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | Fainted69 | 55% | 187 |
| #4 | [OG] BIGDOG | 49% | 39 |
| #5 | MrParanoia_ | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fainted69 | 197 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #2 | MrParanoia_ | 171 | 0.38 | 4 min |
| #3 | Hawkeye | 132 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | [OG] BIGDOG | 98 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | [OG] Agent Masicker | 55 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrParanoia_ | +2.32 | 56 | 62 |
| #2 | Hawkeye | +2.22 | 62 | 45 |
| #3 | Fainted69 | +1.97 | 64 | 52 |
| #4 | [OG] Agent Masicker | +0.82 | 35 | 54 |
| #5 | ANTHRAX+SYPHILIS | -0.43 | 50 | 63 |





