








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 795 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1227 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,148 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1816 | 30% |
| Smokes | 770 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 2136 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1426 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $996,504 of utility $215 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 303 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ¤Koura¤ | 62% | 47 |
| #2 | Jake | 58% | 90 |
| #3 | V-Lane | 51% | 91 |
| #4 | Kimees | 50% | 36 |
| #5 | SUOMIOWNZ | 46% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Kimees | 50% | 36 |
| #5 | SUOMIOWNZ | 46% | 39 |
| #6 | Stoner | 38% | 13 |
| #7 | Jeff | 33% | 15 |
| #8 | polluri | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jake | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | SUOMIOWNZ | 8 | 0.0107 |
| #3 | V-Lane | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | ¤Koura¤ | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Kimees | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ¤Koura¤ | 289 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| #2 | Jake | 209 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | V-Lane | 196 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | polluri | 81 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| #5 | Kimees | 67 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | polluri | +7.40 | 90 | 71 |
| #2 | Jake | +3.57 | 60 | 69 |
| #3 | Stoner | +3.52 | 77 | 66 |
| #4 | Kimees | +2.03 | 67 | 59 |
| #5 | ¤Koura¤ | +1.90 | 67 | 73 |





