








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
851 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,775 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 976 | 35% |
| Smokes | 673 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1034 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 92 | 3% |
Our logs show you have wasted $112,481 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rambo Orr | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | KALJUKATKARAPU | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | Vilttiketju | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Ask me about fish | 47% | 49 |
| #5 | elmerixx64 | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Vilttiketju | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Ask me about fish | 47% | 49 |
| #5 | elmerixx64 | 45% | 20 |
| #6 | Draguni | 43% | 7 |
| #7 | PURA! | 0% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ask me about fish | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Rambo Orr | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ask me about fish | 229 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #2 | elmerixx64 | 25 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Vilttiketju | 20 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | Draguni | 17 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | Rambo Orr | 14 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KALJUKATKARAPU | +2.48 | 63 | 50 |
| #2 | Draguni | +1.24 | 73 | 44 |
| #3 | ✪Jona | +1.22 | 82 | 58 |
| #4 | Rambo Orr | +0.15 | 68 | 67 |
| #5 | elmerixx64 | -2.24 | 65 | 44 |





