










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1475 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1305 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1104 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1693 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1122 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $517,258 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 327 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Danimir999 | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | Nino´S | 49% | 41 |
| #3 | Raulgenius | 42% | 19 |
| #4 | puxerito_rico✈ ⛟♿☠ ⛴ | 42% | 50 |
| #5 | aT | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puxerito_rico✈ ⛟♿☠ ⛴ | 14 | 0.0134 |
| #2 | Nino´S | 8 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | la pupa | 6 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Jaymy | 5 | 0.0063 |
| #5 | -Naijar | 2 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaymy | 123 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | puxerito_rico✈ ⛟♿☠ ⛴ | 120 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | Nino´S | 105 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | Raulgenius | 83 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | la pupa | 76 | 0.06 | 1 min |





