








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 739 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1646 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,017 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2065 | 41% |
| Smokes | 1025 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 714 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1213 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $233,759 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1269 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grumpy | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | Doink | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | ErKo | 65% | 34 |
| #4 | Ice Man | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | DExcitE | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grumpy | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | Doink | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | ErKo | 65% | 34 |
| #4 | Ice Man | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | DExcitE | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ErKo | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | DExcitE | 2 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | Ice Man | 2 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | Doink | 2 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ErKo | 120 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | DExcitE | 39 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | Grumpy | 31 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | Doink | 20 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | Ice Man | 11 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ErKo | +3.09 | 77 | 62 |
| #2 | -Diamant | +2.91 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | DExcitE | -0.42 | 54 | 55 |
| #4 | Doink | -0.48 | 72 | 34 |
| #5 | Grumpy | -1.94 | 38 | 53 |





