










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 551 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3760 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,632 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1791 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2759 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3075 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3007 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,166,805 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 199 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chipstur | 61% | 179 |
| #2 | JohnBPKC | 61% | 23 |
| #3 | Noodles | 57% | 40 |
| #4 | ☽ luverance | 57% | 46 |
| #5 | Lethal | 53% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | JohnBPKC | 61% | 23 |
| #3 | Noodles | 57% | 40 |
| #4 | ☽ luverance | 57% | 46 |
| #5 | Lethal | 53% | 55 |
| #6 | Ryse | 52% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chipstur | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | ☽ luverance | 5 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Ryse | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Lethal | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chipstur | 598 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | ☽ luverance | 91 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Ryse | 87 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Lethal | 58 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | JohnBPKC | 28 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shaye | +3.18 | 83 | 59 |
| #2 | ☽ luverance | +3.12 | 85 | 67 |
| #3 | Ryse | +1.35 | 79 | 68 |
| #4 | Chipstur | +0.73 | 77 | 71 |
| #5 | Noodles | +0.06 | 68 | 43 |





