








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 97 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 296 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4088 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,430 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3949 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4325 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2434 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1722 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,195,338 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 180 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomi | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | vanoid | 64% | 42 |
| #3 | Ditro | 56% | 258 |
| #4 | NiKi | 49% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomi | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | vanoid | 64% | 42 |
| #3 | Ditro | 56% | 258 |
| #4 | NiKi | 49% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanoid | 9 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | Ditro | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | NiKi | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | tomi | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ditro | 1298 | 0.23 | 26 min |
| #2 | vanoid | 171 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #3 | tomi | 84 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | NiKi | 59 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanoid | +4.80 | 81 | 60 |
| #2 | 0da | +1.12 | 57 | 65 |
| #3 | tomi | -1.04 | 74 | 66 |
| #4 | Ditro | -1.16 | 69 | 60 |
| #5 | NiKi | -3.90 | 31 | 30 |





