








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 682 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 483 matches | ||
| Faceit | 93 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5771 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,978 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4185 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4175 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3309 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3309 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,358,256 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 746 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrJF4 | 58% | 36 |
| #2 | Willy 32 | 57% | 141 |
| #3 | William | 52% | 119 |
| #4 | BemariiMiesツ | 51% | 117 |
| #5 | Kingen | 51% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BemariiMiesツ | 26 | 0.0104 |
| #2 | R3kku goodman | 17 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | William | 16 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | Kingen | 14 | 0.0069 |
| #5 | Sorvist-Tjänst | 10 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sorvist-Tjänst | 750 | 0.12 | 19 min |
| #2 | Krax | 519 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #3 | R3kku goodman | 343 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | Willy 32 | 294 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | BemariiMiesツ | 268 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kingen | +2.81 | 82 | 49 |
| #2 | William | +1.62 | 81 | 52 |
| #3 | Freezy ketor | +0.86 | 66 | 57 |
| #4 | BemariiMiesツ | +0.59 | 75 | 51 |
| #5 | Sorvist-Tjänst | +0.54 | 61 | 65 |





