








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
831 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,897 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 367 | 19% |
| Smokes | 391 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 564 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 575 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $360,503 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kronos | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | Suh | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | Lockets | 43% | 14 |
| #4 | TheVulture | 35% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kronos | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | Suh | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | Lockets | 43% | 14 |
| #4 | TheVulture | 35% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheVulture | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Lockets | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheVulture | 261 | 0.30 | 6 min |
| #2 | Lockets | 75 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| #3 | Suh | 65 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| #4 | kronos | 19 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kronos | +2.97 | 68 | 62 |
| #2 | Lockets | +0.84 | 89 | 35 |
| #3 | TheVulture | +0.44 | 70 | 57 |
| #4 | culture | -0.34 | 71 | 43 |
| #5 | Suh | -1.48 | 59 | 55 |





