








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 68 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 181 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1611 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,796 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3453 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2991 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2138 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2214 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $432,619 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 350 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ehzo | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | FakeFox | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | sapo | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | Johnzin 157 xoxota | 57% | 30 |
| #5 | teteia | 52% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | FakeFox | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | sapo | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | Johnzin 157 xoxota | 57% | 30 |
| #5 | teteia | 52% | 84 |
| #6 | xitaozinho | 52% | 144 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | teteia | 18 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | xitaozinho | 11 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | sapo | 4 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Johnzin 157 xoxota | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | FakeFox | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | teteia | 632 | 0.35 | 14 min |
| #2 | xitaozinho | 522 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #3 | FakeFox | 155 | 0.29 | 4 min |
| #4 | sapo | 57 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Johnzin 157 xoxota | 39 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FakeFox | +3.58 | 79 | 77 |
| #2 | Johnzin 157 xoxota | +1.42 | 67 | 49 |
| #3 | Mano ÁSIA | +0.82 | 40 | 73 |
| #4 | xitaozinho | +0.68 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | ehzo | +0.50 | 36 | 64 |





