








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 137 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2463 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,276 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3006 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2123 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1661 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2486 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $822,116 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cir | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | Burnt-iwnl- | 57% | 132 |
| #3 | Vismo | 55% | 47 |
| #4 | runner | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | Citrustrack | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Vismo | 55% | 47 |
| #4 | runner | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | Citrustrack | 50% | 22 |
| #6 | DJ01 | 50% | 28 |
| #7 | HTKLilGoose | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Burnt-iwnl- | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Vismo | 5 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | DJ01 | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | HTKLilGoose | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | runner | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Burnt-iwnl- | 643 | 0.22 | 16 min |
| #2 | runner | 232 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | Vismo | 146 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | DJ01 | 123 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #5 | Citrustrack | 73 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJ01 | +2.83 | 91 | 60 |
| #2 | runner | +2.81 | 83 | 69 |
| #3 | Citrustrack | +0.82 | 77 | 51 |
| #4 | Burnt-iwnl- | +0.67 | 73 | 68 |
| #5 | jmac | -0.13 | 81 | 64 |





