








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 702 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 363 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Renown | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6659 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6113 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6796 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6613 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5659 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $829,642 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 509 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lebkuchen-Genießer | 58% | 156 |
| #2 | kind. | 57% | 281 |
| #3 | JuicyBootyEater_69 | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | Compack | 53% | 337 |
| #5 | Feldqualle | 53% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lebkuchen-Genießer | 58% | 156 |
| #2 | kind. | 57% | 281 |
| #3 | JuicyBootyEater_69 | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | Compack | 53% | 337 |
| #5 | Feldqualle | 53% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kind. | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Compack | 4 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | Lebkuchen-Genießer | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | JuicyBootyEater_69 | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | Feldqualle | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Compack | 940 | 0.14 | 23 min |
| #2 | kind. | 784 | 0.14 | 21 min |
| #3 | Lebkuchen-Genießer | 398 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #4 | Feldqualle | 273 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | JuicyBootyEater_69 | 53 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crusher | +2.79 | 83 | 74 |
| #2 | JuicyBootyEater_69 | +1.38 | 88 | 55 |
| #3 | Lebkuchen-Genießer | +0.29 | 77 | 58 |
| #4 | kind. | -0.91 | 71 | 62 |
| #5 | Compack | -1.27 | 73 | 60 |





