








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 921 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 137 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4010 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,290 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3608 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4332 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2256 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3094 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $693,496 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 278 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | piima jumal | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | .aZ | 67% | 24 |
| #3 | Psycannalise | 66% | 29 |
| #4 | H0PE | 60% | 20 |
| #5 | Sr1ft | 60% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Raksss | 56% | 36 |
| #8 | -AL- | 48% | 23 |
| #9 | MRHP | 47% | 19 |
| #10 | G0blin | 45% | 20 |
| #11 | Kr1zzler | 35% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MRHP | 5 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | piima jumal | 5 | 0.0148 |
| #3 | Kr1zzler | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | 1salv | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | Raksss | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1salv | 306 | 0.41 | 7 min |
| #2 | Kr1zzler | 132 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Raksss | 88 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | G0blin | 51 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Sr1ft | 47 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 999-† dm for coaching 1 on 1 | +6.11 | 83 | 67 |
| #2 | .aZ | +2.35 | 69 | 51 |
| #3 | Sr1ft | +1.89 | 75 | 58 |
| #4 | Raksss | +1.74 | 72 | 51 |
| #5 | 1salv | +0.68 | 69 | 68 |





