








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 468 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 252 matches | ||
| Premier | 220 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5583 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,624 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5578 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4968 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5077 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4001 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $987,091 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 393 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jah! | 55% | 31 |
| #2 | PasteWorthy | 55% | 62 |
| #3 | MMMike | 55% | 196 |
| #4 | nick | 51% | 270 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jah! | 55% | 31 |
| #2 | PasteWorthy | 55% | 62 |
| #3 | MMMike | 55% | 196 |
| #4 | nick | 51% | 270 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nick | 13 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | MMMike | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | jah! | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nick | 615 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #2 | MMMike | 390 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | PasteWorthy | 160 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | jah! | 32 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jah! | +2.98 | 74 | 55 |
| #2 | 𝙨𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙝 | +1.44 | 72 | 62 |
| #3 | nick | +1.22 | 66 | 65 |
| #4 | PasteWorthy | +0.61 | 74 | 52 |
| #5 | MMMike | -0.29 | 66 | 57 |





