








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 101 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 43 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
570 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,615 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 405 | 25% |
| Smokes | 445 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 327 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 438 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $260,772 of utility $219 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 46 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jimmy | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Rusty | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jimmy | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Rusty | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rusty | 47 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | Jimmy | 4 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jimmy | +4.89 | 98 | 42 |
| #2 | Peanut Butter Baby | +1.02 | 85 | 53 |
| #3 | Rusty | -0.09 | 79 | 63 |





