








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 174 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 294 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3829 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,867 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 976 | 10% |
| Smokes | 1771 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 3938 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 3182 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,153,723 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oSE | 54% | 111 |
| #2 | Mordiac | 54% | 52 |
| #3 | Jokey Smurf | 53% | 47 |
| #4 | Poksy<3 | 53% | 32 |
| #5 | megan | 53% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hrgojranbo | 413 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #2 | oSE | 374 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #3 | Jokey Smurf | 363 | 0.36 | 9 min |
| #4 | Seissi | 322 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #5 | foadvaan | 239 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hrgojranbo | +1.94 | 55 | 75 |
| #2 | ✘M✘ッ | +1.50 | 56 | 51 |
| #3 | oSE | +0.56 | 61 | 70 |
| #4 | Bäska | +0.32 | 42 | 39 |
| #5 | SharP | -0.03 | 24 | 81 |





