








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 135 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
201 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,235 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 655 | 53% |
| Smokes | 156 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 372 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 52 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $55,189 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LIL MAN | 43% | 7 |
| #2 | ENatty400 | 38% | 34 |
| #3 | Heisenberg | 38% | 40 |
| #4 | feyriz | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LIL MAN | 43% | 7 |
| #2 | ENatty400 | 38% | 34 |
| #3 | Heisenberg | 38% | 40 |
| #4 | feyriz | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ENatty400 | 5 | 0.0073 |
| #2 | LIL MAN | 5 | 0.0333 |
| #3 | Heisenberg | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | feyriz | 1 | 0.0179 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ENatty400 | 98 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | Heisenberg | 70 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | LIL MAN | 8 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | feyriz | 6 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ENatty400 | +2.30 | 61 | 70 |
| #2 | feyriz | +1.19 | 84 | 28 |
| #3 | LIL MAN | +0.32 | 80 | 35 |
| #4 | Heisenberg | -1.21 | 61 | 52 |
| #5 | FTCNARD5 | -4.61 | 14 | 59 |





