










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 390 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 356 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 239 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3122 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,289 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1241 | 15% |
| Smokes | 2349 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2660 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2039 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,023,075 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 493 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Flawes | 50% | 261 |
| #5 | ✪ Ruxxii | 49% | 73 |
| #6 | Crema De Porro | 48% | 254 |
| #7 | ✪ SNX | 45% | 44 |
| #8 | Ahsikimeh | 45% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flawes | 897 | 0.17 | 25 min |
| #2 | Crema De Porro | 288 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #3 | ✪ Ruxxii | 182 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | Maceter0 | 174 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | Ahsikimeh | 174 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ SNX | +3.33 | 76 | 61 |
| #2 | Zero Two's Man-Slut | +2.05 | 77 | 59 |
| #3 | Ahsikimeh | +1.91 | 85 | 62 |
| #4 | Maceter0 | +0.89 | 59 | 49 |
| #5 | Flawes | +0.51 | 52 | 72 |





