








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 59 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
901 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,886 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 570 | 15% |
| Smokes | 865 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1236 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1215 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $153,428 of utility $59 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PrematureShooter | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | whos Greggo | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | Trashboat | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | Tim | 57% | 14 |
| #5 | Somada | 57% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | a gun | 281 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | Somada | 104 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Quantavious Von Dinglefin | 59 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Trashboat | 43 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | Peanut | 43 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | a gun | +7.58 | 76 | 60 |
| #2 | Radiant Valorant Player | +3.07 | 76 | 73 |
| #3 | Somada | +2.45 | 80 | 68 |
| #4 | Trashboat | +0.80 | 72 | 69 |
| #5 | Tim | -0.05 | 49 | 55 |





