








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
595 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,093 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 453 | 41% |
| Smokes | 170 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 247 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 223 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $143,581 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 92 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5head | 52% | 33 |
| #2 | gaybaby | 48% | 56 |
| #3 | PIMUU | 43% | 72 |
| #4 | Seal | 40% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5head | 52% | 33 |
| #2 | gaybaby | 48% | 56 |
| #3 | PIMUU | 43% | 72 |
| #4 | Seal | 40% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5head | 16 | 0.0242 |
| #2 | PIMUU | 8 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | gaybaby | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Seal | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PIMUU | 64 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #2 | 5head | 54 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Seal | 12 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #4 | gaybaby | 9 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EASY GETDRECKT | +2.82 | 71 | 44 |
| #2 | 5head | +2.53 | 88 | 27 |
| #3 | PIMUU | +1.53 | 65 | 53 |
| #4 | gaybaby | -2.60 | 39 | 15 |
| #5 | Seal | -5.76 | 36 | 18 |





