








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 366 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 210 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2626 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,965 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1160 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1247 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1664 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1894 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,130,999 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 304 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EmilBFS | 50% | 84 |
| #2 | Jumper | 50% | 167 |
| #3 | Zapdicado | 48% | 147 |
| #4 | lukz | 48% | 227 |
| #5 | The-Guineapig | 42% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lukz | 14 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Zapdicado | 12 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | EmilBFS | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Jumper | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | GgormingG | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lukz | +3.49 | 89 | 49 |
| #2 | Zapdicado | +0.03 | 65 | 49 |
| #3 | Jumper | -0.78 | 57 | 65 |
| #4 | Johnic | -1.01 | 60 | 40 |
| #5 | EmilBFS | -1.42 | 64 | 26 |





