








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 513 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2333 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,635 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 715 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1339 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2404 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 1177 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,453,887 of utility $259 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 543 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Borja blajt gleich | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | Heinz | 54% | 87 |
| #3 | Edd0s | 52% | 125 |
| #4 | Black | 52% | 60 |
| #5 | Самурай191 | 51% | 157 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Black | 52% | 60 |
| #5 | Самурай191 | 51% | 157 |
| #6 | Genex | 50% | 70 |
| #7 | Don | 48% | 161 |
| #8 | Panda | 46% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Heinz | 8 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | Самурай191 | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Edd0s | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Don | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #5 | Panda | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Edd0s | 116 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Genex | 83 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | Heinz | 66 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Black | 43 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Самурай191 | 35 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Don | +2.97 | 64 | 23 |
| #2 | Genex | +1.91 | 62 | 52 |
| #3 | Borja blajt gleich | +1.72 | 70 | 54 |
| #4 | Aco | +1.68 | 59 | 47 |
| #5 | Black | +0.15 | 56 | 58 |





