










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
407 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,233 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 631 | 20% |
| Smokes | 368 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 965 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1269 | 39% |
Our logs show you have wasted $435,179 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Femboy Fanatic | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | Serton♝ | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | Narr1 | 54% | 26 |
| #4 | FNAR | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | Spermino retardino | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fizzy | 128 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #2 | Beggzor ☂ | 92 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | Serton♝ | 63 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | Narr1 | 57 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Snjókaddl | 57 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spermino retardino | +6.15 | 97 | 82 |
| #2 | mind cntrl | +5.33 | 91 | 61 |
| #3 | Serton♝ | +5.14 | 70 | 57 |
| #4 | Femboy Fanatic | +5.08 | 93 | 70 |
| #5 | Snjókaddl | +3.91 | 95 | 63 |





