








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 183 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1155 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,784 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1108 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1173 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 643 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 860 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $336,979 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vidar Bjørklund | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Andy | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Nugyatti | 42% | 12 |
| #4 | DinFar? | 40% | 15 |
| #5 | Herring | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vidar Bjørklund | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Andy | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Nugyatti | 42% | 12 |
| #4 | DinFar? | 40% | 15 |
| #5 | Herring | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DinFar? | 2 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Herring | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Nugyatti | 1 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Vidar Bjørklund | 1 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Andy | 1 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herring | 62 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | Nugyatti | 47 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #3 | DinFar? | 37 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Andy | 28 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | Vidar Bjørklund | 18 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gigachad andy | +0.77 | 73 | 61 |
| #2 | Herring | +0.71 | 89 | 71 |
| #3 | Nugyatti | -0.97 | 39 | 46 |
| #4 | DinFar? | -1.41 | 50 | 39 |
| #5 | Vidar Bjørklund | -2.24 | 34 | 61 |





