








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 86 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1089 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,641 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 566 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1176 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 886 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1013 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $534,683 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 216 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DT | 42% | 31 |
| #2 | DogeKev | 42% | 36 |
| #3 | maybeBZRK | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | Boom Booms Expert | 40% | 73 |
| #5 | moorey23 | 38% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DT | 42% | 31 |
| #2 | DogeKev | 42% | 36 |
| #3 | maybeBZRK | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | Boom Booms Expert | 40% | 73 |
| #5 | moorey23 | 38% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boom Booms Expert | 12 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | DogeKev | 6 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | DT | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | moorey23 | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | maybeBZRK | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boom Booms Expert | 271 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #2 | maybeBZRK | 167 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | DT | 86 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | moorey23 | 53 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | DogeKev | 52 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boom Booms Expert | +3.18 | 87 | 56 |
| #2 | DT | +0.51 | 88 | 59 |
| #3 | DogeKev | +0.33 | 60 | 48 |
| #4 | maybeBZRK | -0.15 | 68 | 50 |
| #5 | Papa Stalin | -1.29 | 39 | 49 |





