








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 45 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 156 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2202 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,239 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2099 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2599 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1898 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2643 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $713,401 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CoreyInTheHouse | 54% | 24 |
| #2 | NightBandit | 54% | 67 |
| #3 | spin | 53% | 81 |
| #4 | disjustin | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | EnxmA | 50% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spin | 9 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | disjustin | 8 | 0.0112 |
| #3 | EnxmA | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | NightBandit | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | CoreyInTheHouse | 3 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EnxmA | 329 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | spin | 256 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | NightBandit | 160 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | disjustin | 125 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | CoreyInTheHouse | 30 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | disjustin | +5.93 | 89 | 68 |
| #2 | NightBandit | +2.14 | 81 | 53 |
| #3 | CoreyInTheHouse | +1.06 | 79 | 50 |
| #4 | Slim Reaperr | +0.34 | 71 | 61 |
| #5 | spin | -0.80 | 59 | 51 |





