








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 2,104 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
646 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,610 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 369 | 23% |
| Smokes | 435 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 408 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 398 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $179,970 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 92 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frysepizza few | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | doku | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | rotte kongen cs.money | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | Chud Loser | 43% | 7 |
| #5 | -=AW=- | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | rotte kongen cs.money | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | Chud Loser | 43% | 7 |
| #5 | -=AW=- | 43% | 7 |
| #6 | deep | 33% | 3 |
| #7 | Mizi | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rotte kongen cs.money | 52 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #2 | doku | 27 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Chud Loser | 20 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | Mizi | 11 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #5 | deep | 9 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frysepizza few | +4.01 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | rotte kongen cs.money | +1.44 | 63 | 65 |
| #3 | Chud Loser | +1.23 | 73 | 72 |
| #4 | ✪ SH!va1337 | +0.80 | 90 | 60 |
| #5 | Mizi | +0.22 | 69 | 67 |





