








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 492 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2774 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,682 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 741 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1473 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1514 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 954 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,296,775 of utility $238 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 662 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lars | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | smufty | 51% | 181 |
| #3 | froemosen | 50% | 104 |
| #4 | BRUCE WAYNE | 48% | 111 |
| #5 | BFL | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | smufty | 51% | 181 |
| #3 | froemosen | 50% | 104 |
| #4 | BRUCE WAYNE | 48% | 111 |
| #5 | BFL | 47% | 15 |
| #6 | HeideFætter | 44% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HeideFætter | 15 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | smufty | 11 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | froemosen | 8 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | BRUCE WAYNE | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Lars | 4 | 0.0086 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smufty | 829 | 0.23 | 23 min |
| #2 | HeideFætter | 228 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | froemosen | 185 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | BRUCE WAYNE | 97 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | Lars | 78 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smufty | +3.06 | 66 | 70 |
| #2 | Steve | +2.13 | 82 | 43 |
| #3 | Lars | +0.37 | 80 | 61 |
| #4 | HeideFætter | -0.65 | 65 | 63 |
| #5 | BFL | -1.12 | 74 | 58 |





