








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1450 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 197 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 144 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5385 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,904 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7471 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5867 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4109 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5457 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,166,966 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1177 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 서지민이다 | 840 | 0.26 | 17 min |
| #2 | 깝치지마씨발럼들아 | 248 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | ddakbro | 122 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | isSeo | 116 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #5 | JaeS2 | 102 | 0.14 | 3 min |





