








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 97 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1678 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,339 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 607 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1227 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1278 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1227 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $353,503 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oowerpoower | 5 | 0.0147 |
| #2 | MoTzis | 4 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | EliOs | 4 | 0.0208 |
| #4 | aatu | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Farmariauto | 2 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aatu | 227 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| #2 | MoTzis | 85 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | McNutLovin | 77 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #4 | Oowerpoower | 64 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | Farmariauto | 37 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EliOs | +5.54 | 76 | 67 |
| #2 | スブラ | +4.73 | 90 | 58 |
| #3 | k1tten | +2.62 | 87 | 61 |
| #4 | Suomen SÖPÖIN kissatyttö X3 : | +1.60 | 59 | 49 |
| #5 | aatu | +1.26 | 75 | 77 |





